A note For When I'm Old And Gray:

JD& the SFA @the Orpheum in LA

the setlist:

System
Last Legal Drug
4U
Hey Daddy
Forsaken
Dirty
Alone I Break
Slept So Long
Love on the Rocks
Hushabye
Kick the PA
Not Meant for Me
Hold On
Blue Monday
Careless
The Chauffer
Tearjerker
Redeemer
Got the Life
Trash
Falling Away from Me




the lyrics from Satan's Night Out:

System

You fell away,
What more can I say?
The feelings evolved,
I won't let it out,
I can't replace...
Your screaming face,
Feeling the sickness inside

Why won't you die?
Your blood in mine…
We'll be fine…
Then your body will be mine

So many words
Can't describe my face
This feeling's evolved
So soon to break out
I can't relate
to a happy state
feeling the blood run inside

Why won't you die?
Your blood in mine…
We'll be fine…
Then your body will be mine

Why is everything so fukking hard for me?
Keep me down to what you think I should be!
Must you tempt me and provoke the ministry?
Keep on trying I’ll not die so easily

I will not die…

Why is everything so fukking hard for me?

I will not die…

Why is everything so fukking hard for me?

I will not die…

Why won't you die?
Your blood is mine….
We'll be fine….
Then your body will be mine (x 2)

Forsaken

I'm over it
You see I'm falling in this vast abyss
Clouded by memories of the past
At last I see...

I hear it fading, I can't speak it
Or else you will dig my grave
You feel them finding, always whining
Take my hand now be alive

[Chorus]
You see I cannot be forsaken
Because I'm not the only one
We walk amongst you feeding, raping
Must we hide from everyone?

I'm over it
Why can't we be together embrace it?
Sleeping so long taking off the mask
At last I see

My fear is fading, I can't speak it
Or else you will dig my grave
You feel them finding, always whining
Take my hand now be alive

[Chorus x 2]

Everyone
Everyone

Redeemer

The hunger inside given to me, makes me what I am
Always it is calling me, for the blood of man
They say I cannot be this, I am jaded, hiding from the day.
I can't bare, I cannot tame the hunger in me!

Oh, I say I did it always searching, you can't fukk with fate.
So instead you'll taste my pain.
The hunger inside given to me, makes me feel alive.
Always out stalking prey, in the dark I hide.
Feeling, falling, hating, feel like I am fading, hating life.

They say I cannot be this, I am jaded, hiding from the day.
I can't bear, I cannot tame the hunger in me...
Oh, I say I did it always searching, you can't fukk with fate.
So instead you'll taste my pain.

You say your life I'm taking, always bothering me, I can't take this anymore, I'm failing, always smothering me

You look down on me, hey what you see, take this gift from me, you will soon feed from me.

Nothing seems exciting, always the same hiding

It's haunting me. It's haunting me. It's haunting me. It's haunting me.

It's haunting me...


Not Meant For Me

You think you're smart
You're not, it's plain to see
That you want me to follow
It's killing me let's see
You've got the gall
Come take it all

The jury is coming
Coming to tear me apart
All this bitching and moaning
Come on it's on!

I'm trapped in this world
Lonely and fading
Heartbroke and waiting
For you to come
We are stuck in this world
That's not meant for me
For me...

So what you got
One last shot
It seems to me
That you're not needed
Come on!
It's killing me let's see
You got the gall
Come take it all

The jury is coming
coming to tear me apart
All this bitching and moaning
Come on it's on!

I'm trapped in this world
Lonely and fading
Heartbroke and waiting
For you to come
We are stuck in this world
That's not meant for me
For me...

I'm trapped in this world
Lonely and fading
Heartbroke and waiting
For you to come
We are stuck in this world
That's not meant for me
For me...

I'm trapped in this world
Lonely and fading
Heartbroke and waiting
For you to come
We are stuck in this world
That's not meant for me...

For me...
For me...


Slept So Long

Walking
Waiting
Alone without a care
Hoping
And hating
Things that I can't bear

Did you think it's cool
To walk right up
To take my life
And fukk it up
Well did you?
Well did you?

I see hell in your eyes
Taken in by surprise (surprise)
Touching you makes me feel alive
Touching you makes me die inside

Walking, Waiting
Alone without a care
Hoping
And hating
Things that I can't bear

Did you think it's cool
To walk right up
To take my life
And fukk it up
Well did you?

I hate you!

I see hell in your eyes
Taken in by surprise
And touching you makes me feel alive
Touching you makes me die inside

I've slept so long without you
It's tearing me apart too
How'd it get this far
Playing games with this old heart
I've killed a million petty souls
But I couldn't kill you

I've slept so long without you

I see hell in your eyes
Taken in by surprise
Touching you makes me feel alive
Touching you makes me die inside


Careless

The breathing of the ancient ones are seldom felt.
I alone have torn their dreams apart.
The pain of this has surely made me what I am
Eventually they all will tear me apart!

You're angry with the beating of
My careless, selfish heart.
You're chasing me cause I'm too close
Scared of what I can start.

I'm the one who's wrong, I know it's not my fault
I am here now I just did my part
It was all of you who made me what I am
It was all of you who cursed my heart

You're angry with the beating of
My careless, selfish heart.
You're chasing me cause I'm too close
Scared of what I can start.

You have forsaken me!
You mother fukkers!
You did this fukked up shit to me!
You fukkin' raped me!
And now... it's time... for me...
To be...
Set free...!
Wake up! Wake up!
Come to me
Wake up!
Be with me

-------end lyrics-------

Well it was Thorny's Night Out, I'll tell you what, I wanted to dress to the nines, but I put on my original Korn T-shirt on to best represent how I felt to actually be there to witness the legendary JD and the SFA perform not only a slew of Korn hits, but the 5 songs Jonathan wrote for Anne Rice's the Vampire Lestat and his band Satan's Night Out. If you haven't already figured out Jonathan Davis is the Vampire Lestat -- you've got some catching up to do.

We arrived downtown LA at the Orpheum theater early enough to be about 10th in line. After we were ushered inside, I plunked down my hard-earned cash for an Alone I Break T-shirt - an awesome shirt by the way -- and the $20 JDSFA DVD - - the original (before it was mass produced). We sidled up to the bar and bought some red wine for the evening's festivities. GODHEAD were about to open up, and I walked by Kalen Chase after getting our wines. I acknowledged him with a slight nod and lift of my wine glass as we exchanged knowing glances.

As we walked into the concert hall itself, we were struck by its lush velvet grandeur, accented by a deep heartblood crimson offset by polished woodwork and gothic carvings. On stage Jon's oaken red velvet throne took the center spotlight; the various instruments and amps arranged artfully about. There was an almost suit & tie atmosphere, very posh and appropriate for this occasion. Miles Mosely occupied stage right, JD sat the entire time in his throne, spazzing out like a five year old possessed of tourettes and trying to shake the demons from his dreadlocks as he grimaced, howled, and sang his heart out to everyone's stunned pleasure. And the songs, DAMN - these songs are fukking HARD.


System kicked off things in prime form, Jonathan practically lurching from his seated position on his wooden throne. There was a savage majesty in the air which the opening song captured perfectly with its intense lyrical vampire addiction theme. Before the last note faded away they launched into a rare bonus korn song from SYOTOS "Last Legal Drug", a worthy performance replete with topical, biting satire from a leering JD. But it was the third song that really reached deep into the collective mindset of the crowd and delivered an explosive anthem I'll never forget: 4U solo. Jon's impassioned vocal delivery to this small group of gathered fans skewered straight through every heart in the room, nailing us to our seats from the intensity of feeling he lent his voice.

"This shit right here is for you!
All your faces I can see
You all think it's about me
I'm about to break
This is my fate.
Am I still damned to a life
Of misery and hate?
You...you'll never know
What I'd do for you!
What you all
Put me through,
I do it for you.
I could have
Never lived
If it wasn't
FOR YOU..."

Dirty and Alone I Break coming one after the other was more than a nice surprise. It was a devastating one-two combo punch to the gut that left everyone gasping for breath when it was over. Just when you thought it couldn't get any more intense than the vocal delivery of 4U, Jon brings it up a notch for a harrowing and beautiful rendition of Alone I Break, something that cannot be described to be appreciated, it must simply be experienced. Little did I know at the time, when the last notes of that song faded away, that we weren't even halfway through the set, yet. This show started from the Top Ledge and just sailed up and away past the highest clouds to claim territory hitherto unimagined by a wholly unprepared audience. To say it carried us all away to another world is an understatement.



The show was chock -full of surprises, one of the best of which was the Jon/Shenkar jam before Careless. Jonathan told the audience to shut our eyes and he'd carry us all away to another place. The tune began with him starting a strident, Arabic wail for a few measures, to which Shenkar would add his ancient mideastern wail, of a higher pitch; they exchanged these haunting ululations for a few measures, and Jonathan's were enough to send chills up our spines. Then, while Shenkar played his haunting mideastern violin, Jon unleashed the most passionate mideastern style vocal portion I've ever heard this side of Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan: I was shocked at the impressiveness of his delivery. This truly was a live musical performance the likes of which peter gabriel could get lost in. It was an extended and unhinged duet of ululations that spread goosebumps over my arms, and the only word that comes to mind is epic. After several minutes of this glorious atmospheric intro, as the high-pitched violin notes decayed in the air and JD's vocal echoes faded in our ears, Jon reached over and grabbed a small viola for the next portion of this incredible intro, which obviously - wasn't over yet! Jon actually plucked out this cool melodic rhythm on a repeat loop, by hand, and allowed Shenkar to build yet another of his fantastic violin soloes. After this section, Jon grabbed the bow yet again for a third, final portion where he soloed an impressive atmospheric finale. "Blown Away" doesn't really come close to describing how I felt after it was over: that intro was one of the high points of the show, and it was only the beginning of the song. Shenkar jammed a bloodthirsty frenzy of insane ancient Vampire music. If Anne Rice had been there - -she'd have fainted straight away.

What a glorious performance, one for the ages. That night in LA was so off the hook, every last song reeled me right through the evening, like a helpless fish baited, hooked, and dragged to shore. There is a lot of weight behind the new song Jonathan had slid up his sleeve, 'Careless'. The song's refrain, which goes

"You're angry with the beating of
My careless, selfish heart.
You're chasing me cause I'm too close
Scared of what I can start"

equals the ease with which jon's original korn lyrics (from selftitled) make declarations involving his direct personal world. (Jon's solo stuff has every bit of immediacy the original korn songs had; the main difference being, the musical accompaniment has morphed into a post-Gabrielesque world-music tinged with a mideastern gothic vampire vibe.) If that isn't off the hook, I don't know what is.

Some of the lyrics in Careless (if abstracted from their intent for the Queen of the Damned) become startling if you apply their meaning towards Head's departure. [*Now please don't get me wrong - I think Head is a great person and this has nothing to do with being against him - its just a meditation on a certain perspective Jon's lyrics have here.] Its notable throughout many lines, even to his final plea to "Wake up!" and "Come to me" and "Be with me"... "Wake up!" . . . even if it wasn't intended, it remains a reference to a [korn] song [from iSsuEs] nonetheless, the very song which pleads "please just let it go, all our heads are flown, let's take the stage and remember what we play for." These are strong words because they accentuate that rending we are all too familiar with, that of one's mate's formerly-stated and bound beliefs suddenly coming undone, when they flip a bitch and drop you like a cold stone. "You have forsaken me", this at least parallels the feelings behind the most recent korn songs off Untitled, only here they're straight out of the cage starving and insane. The passion contained within the emotional subtext of Careless, when filtered and refined through the many layers of the band's history, lends it a degree of heaviness nearly impossible to convey without having "been there"; that is, been moved yourself beyond description by the ferocity with which Jon delivers his words straight from the heart. Not to mention that same intensity expressed continuously since the band's inception and original tour kicked off back in '94. Few singers from heavy rock bands can match Jonathan's sustained intensity of ballistic emotive expression, going on for over a decade and a half now. The subtext in the song Careless is all too clear, and somehow, channeling the podium upon which the ancient vampire Lestat perceives his world, Jonathan funnels and amplifies koRn's own subtextual elements into something I can only describe as "anthemic despair". The vampire music and koRn's own aggro style inform and complement each other quite effectively. One thirsts for honesty & integrity while the other thirsts for blood and redemption. What is blood if not honest and integral? And who is this Jonathan Davis, if not the Vampire Lestat himself? He is an absolute original musician and singer to watch out for during the next decade, that's who he is.